Monday, February 25, 2008

You asked, I'll tell...

Well, I guess after my last somewhat cryptic blog an update is in order.

Greasemonkey and I went out on a date Friday night and, in case you didn't get it, he kissed me. It was incredible. He's easily the best kisser I've ever come across. When we were "just friends" he always told me that he wasn't interested in me because he didn't feel that "spark". I think he got more spark than he expected.

Saturday he had to go to a funeral in Newton (near Logan) and asked if I would go with him. He said he really felt like he needed me there with him. So, bright and early Saturday morning we left for Newton. We spent the day with his good friends Jared and Brittany (a married couple). The day went really well, and in the car on the way home we discussed our status, future, everything. We came to the conclusion that we're now officially together. So, my friends, for the first time in over 2 years I've got someone to call me Baby, someone to open car doors for me (he gets mad if I do it myself, even getting out of the car), someone to snuggle up with and watch Fiddler on the Roof (we have a thing for musicals, ok?), and someone who's not afraid to kiss me in public.

We spent a few hours together this morning before he went to work. We didn't even do anything exciting, just a little car shopping (for him, I'm happy with mine), and a few other errands. I was happy, though, because I was with him. He knows how I feel about the new 2008 Subaru Outback wagons, so he made it a point to take me to the Subaru dealership to "window shop". When we pulled into the dealership I asked him why we were there, he can't afford a new Subaru, and I'm happy with what I've got, and he said, "Sure, but we can look and dream, Babe." I melted a little. Then about 10 minutes after he dropped me off back at home I got a text from him telling me that he felt a little silly, but he missed me already. I teased him a little until he said, "I'm falling for you more everyday." I melted again.

I realize that we're still in the "honeymoon phase" of our relationship, and that things won't always stay like this. I hope, though, that my knees will always go a little weak when he kisses me, and that he'll continue to do little things that make me melt a little.


Saturday, February 23, 2008

A Friday Night Story





You'd better believe that sparks flew tonight...

Friday, February 22, 2008

Things are good.

Things are going well... really well.

Maybe this week he'll finally kiss me.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Poetry in motion

A poem I am stealing from the blog of Mr. B. (If you want to steal the format you can find it on his blog):

I am tall and amazing.
I wonder what the future holds.
I hear music when I walk.
I see stars in lovers' eyes.
I want utter and complete joy.
I am tall and amazing.

I pretend that I am confident.
I feel love for those around me.
I touch the hearts of patients.
I worry about being alone.
I cry daily.
I am tall and amazing.

I understand who I am inside.
I say what I feel.
I dream about the future.
I try to have hope.
I hope for love.
I am tall and amazing.

A girl can dream...

So, I've had the future on my mind a lot lately (go figure on that one, eh?) and I've found a few of my "dreams" for the future. I'd like to share some of them with you.

My Dream House:

I've always wanted an old victorian and this one is perfect. I love the size, the angles, and the fact that it has 5 bedrooms. All in all, fantastic.

My dream cars (practical and impractical):

The Porsche is obviously my impractical dream car, the Subaru is actually attainable...
My dream ring:

The best part is: over 2 carats worth of stones and only $700. Man, I love fake diamonds!

My dream kitchen:

Simple, sunny, and gorgeous. I love it.

My dream jobs:

And until I can have that particular job, I'll take this one:

So, my friends, just a few of my hopes and dreams for the future. I guess I'll just wait and see which of them come to pass...

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Wait and see

This week I was inspired by an episode of Scrubs. Silly? Yes. But let me share what I learned...

I am not a "wait and see" person. Pretty much the moment I feel like I know what I need to do I jump right in and get 'er done. I don't beat around the bush over-thinking things, I don't sit around waiting for life to happen to me.

Well, when it comes to recent events in my life it has been incredibly hard for me to not just jump right in and act on what I feel like I need to do. I feel like I know what Heavenly Father has in store for me, I feel like I know what path I need to take, and I feel like I know what steps I need to take to get there. So, for the boy, we'll call him Greasemonkey, to be so unsure of what to do is frustrating to me. I realize I can't force him to see things the way I do, I know that I have to wait for him to draw his own conclusions from the incredible experience we had.

My issue with the whole experience is that I am a firm believer in everything happening for a reason, especially in the temple. There is no such thing as chance or coincidence. We pray, we receive answers, we act, and we are blessed. I feel like I know why this particular experience happened, but he's still not sure. He's so busy analyzing it looking for a deeper meaning that he's missing what's right there on the surface: we both went in praying about what to do with our respective love interests, we were asked to do sealings, kneeling across the altar from each other felt right, and we both got the feeling that the Lord was trying to tell us something. Granted, I was already several steps ahead of him by being interested in him.

He says he just doesn't feel that "spark" with me. Now, I have a theory on this matter... we're both very physically-oriented people. When it comes to the 5 love languages we are both very much "physical touch" people. We have yet to explore that aspect of our "relationship". We've never held hands, we've hugged maybe twice in the 4 months we've known each other, and we've definitely never kissed. We cuddle occasionally, but it's just not the same. My theory is that the "spark" is going to continue to be missing until we finally venture into the great unknown of kissing, etc. (And believe me, I want to!). I think Greasemonkey is always going to view me as just a friend until he makes an attempt to make me more than that.

So, herein lies the problem: he's a "wait and see" person. He feels like we should just continue on the way we've been going and see what develops. I want to act. And here, we've arrived at an impasse.

So I guess for the time being I'll wait and see, and maybe someday (hopefully sooner rather than later) he'll decide to cross over to my side of things and take some action. (And in the process give me some action ;) ).

Thursday, February 7, 2008

Like Sands Through the Hourglass

Wow, what an interesting few weeks it has been. So much has happened, and I have so much I feel the need to write about. The question is: Where do I start?

I guess I'll start with the biggest event of recent days... I went through the Salt Lake temple on Saturday and recieved my endowment. It was a very special day that I've been preparing for for a long time. It also just so happened to fall on the day of President Hinckley's funeral. I figure what better way is there to honor the "temple prophet" than to go to the temple on that day. It was a wonderful afternoon spent with family and friends, and I know that I will be blessed for keeping the covenants I made that day. I feel so blessed to be a member of a church that utilizes temples. It is so comforting for me to know that I have a place where I can go to be surrounded by the spirit, converse with my Heavenly Father, and recieve answers to prayers. On that note, I'll move on to the second big event of recent days...

I wanted to do another temple session soon after receiving my endowment, just so I could better focus on the whole process. Well, I decided that on Tuesday I would go do another session. A close male friend of mine offered to come with me since he had the day off work. Well, I happen to have a bit (okay a lot) of a thing for this particular friend, but he hasn't been reciprocating the feelings. Well, I went to the temple on Tuesday in fasting and prayer, specifically looking for an answer to whether I should continue to pursue something with him or not. Let me tell you, I got my answer loud and clear. I'm a firm believer in everything happening for a reason, especially in the temple. There is no such thing as coincidence. Well, as soon as we walked in the door, the sweet little man scanning recommends asked us if we'd be willing to help out with sealings. We said we'd be glad to help, and went to get dressed. Obviously, the little wheels inside my head were turning at this point. I knew Heavenly Father was trying to tell me something, and I was going to do my best to pick up what he was throwing down. My friend and I went up to the sealing room and patiently waited our turn. The moment we knelt across the altar from each other it all fell together for me. I knew I had my answer.

Later, as we were walking back to his car to go run some errands he looked at me and said, "Well, that was about the strangest day at the temple I've ever had." Not having much to compare it to I asked him to elaborate. He smiled at me and said, "Do you think the Lord is trying to tell us something?" I laughed, and told him that I'd received the same message. We talked about it a little further, ran our errands, and moved on with our day. Well, last night we went out to dinner and spent some time together and we talked about it again. He's still not sure about what the Lord was trying to tell him... I'll wait patiently til he figures it out. :) If nothing else the whole experience strengthened my testimony that the Lord hears our prayers and answers them, not always in the way we expect.

Well, my friends, that's about all I can think of for now. Just know that life is good. I'm happier than I've been in a long time, and I can definitely see the Lord's hand in my life everyday. I will for sure keep you all posted on things to come. Know that I think of each of you daily and pray for you.

Much love, my friends!